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Journal
20six blog, R.I.P
Since it looks like there are only about 20 people who still read the comic here (or else there are only 20 people who read the comments under last week's strip) I think maybe it's time to finally lay this blog to rest. From now on you can read the comic at : www.beaverandsteve.com You'll still find all the comments under each comic in the excitingly titled 'news' section, and you can find my new blog with features that actually work (and the purple background that everyone seems to like) at livejournal. Ta-ta 20six! Express your outrage in the comments below.
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#274 - lobstu'thu petuniaghn
I wish I could have finished this one properly because I was kind of pleased with how it came out, but then I spent 3 hours trying to decide what Beaver should say in that last panel. I can think of at least 14 better ways of spending 3 hours.
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I will be the champion of Operation
I had a moment of panic when I noticed that a large crumb of what may be the finest chocolate muffin in London (the rest of the muffin having already been consumed with relish*) had lodged itself betwixt my 'm' key and my spacebar. For a moment I was paralysed with the fear of it being lost forever in the innards of my keyboard, but then the adrenaline kicked in and with preternatural speed I flicked open my pencil case and, using the tips of two pencils with surgical precision, I liberated the chocolatey nugget from it's lexicographical prison. Then I ate it. I really should have read this first... * I might not add the relish next time
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#232 - coma-geddon - part 3
Originally it was going to be the delicious aroma of Beaver's future tea that awoke his past-self form a coma, but then I remembered the cardinal rule: everything is better with LASERS. Have I told you lot I am going to be at the Lancaster Comic Convention this saturday? Cos I am. See me there!
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We have a result. Sort of.
I got another email from [SMELLY EX-LANDLORD] last night. I just couldn't face more grief, so I put just closed my mail program and went to bed without reading it. But this morning I new it had to be done... Baboonio,
Further to my earlier email, which did not cover the items left in the cellar/garden, whilst I still think they should have been cleared away, if they were there when you arrived then I am prepared to pay for this myself. I will therefore pay that amount into your accounts on monday when I am back in the office.
Please pass this message to [EX-FLATMATE] as I don't have his email address on my blackberry.
I hope you find this agreeable, and see that I am trying to be as reasonable as possible.
Best regards,
[SMELLY EX-LANDLORD]
It's not much (it will just be £27.50 each) but it's a start. I suppose you're all going to try to tell me to squeeze him for more now. Ugh. Have I mentioned how much I hate conflict?
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Got his reply. He's not budging.
Baboon,
Thank you for your email, in response to which I make the following points:
- I was wrong not to inspect the flat when previous tenants left, however that is irrelevant in your case - a full inspection is appropriate and the purpose of the deposits is to indemnify me against any failure on your part to meet your obligations which result in my having incurring costs to rectify them;
- The contract is binary: either the carpets have been cleaned or they have not, and in this case they had not. The same argument applies for the sofas and general cleaning of the flat - it's either clean or not, and in this case it was not, and I paid £40 to have that put right.
- With regards to the complaints you made during your tenancy, I firstly disagree with you that they were not properly dealt with (except for the door on the fridge freezer) and they are, again, irrelevant in the context of the deposits. The mould in the fridge is unrelated to the absence of a door on the freezer - it had never been mentioned before and should not have happened had the fridge been regularly cleaned; I am deducting no money for the state of the carpet in the bathroom, and am having it replaced at my own expense; the cistern leak was not happening when I came round to look at it; the faulty bathroom door handle was removed, and a replacement bought - it was not unreasonable to expect you to take 2 minutes to screw it to the door, which was still fully functional and lockable; I am replacing the entire kitchen, which would have been during your occupancy had you still been there; and I am not charging you for the bathroom ceiling...
I had in fact tried to improve the flat constantly during your tenancy, and prioritised the improvements to be the things that were affordable and appropriate at the time, eg the cooker and impending new kitchen.
- Whilst I understand entirely your instinct and right for self preservation, I really do feel that changing a fuse is such a basic thing to do that there is no way I'm prepared to pay for the electrician myself. I called him to come around the day after you moved out, and received a call from him saying that he was astonished you hadn't changed the fuse yourself. It is not the landlord's obligation to change light bulbs, fuses in plugs, toilet roll in the toilet roll holder, or the fuses in the fuse-box.
I will not deny that [EX-FLATMATE] has proven to be one of the most unpleasant people that I have ever had the misfortune to deal with. He has been rude, obnoxious and confrontational almost from the day he moved in, and that was indeed the reason why my email was toned as it was.
It is not my intention to inconvenience you or to deduct any more than necessary, but I have incurred some real expenses putting right what should have been done by the tenants. Where there is any doubt (ie bathroom ceiling) I have not made a deduction, therefore I think that those I have made are entirely reasonable.
I am sorry if you are not of the same view.
Best regards,
[SMELLY EX-LANDLORD]
I'd just like to give up and forget about it really. I hate confrontation! Hate it!
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Ooh, I hate being cross!
I arrived at work to find a very aggravating email in my inbox from my ex-landlord (not sure what that first sentence is about, but I think it's a response to something my slightly aggro ex-flatmate has said to him) :
And I do not appreciate finding the flat in shit order:
1) Mould in fridge
2) Rubbish and unwanted items left outside the flat and in the cellar
3) Carpet filthy
4) Sofas filthy, the arms had actually gone brown
5) Cooker not clean
6) Flat generally dirty, dust and junk swept under fridge, kitchen units and sofas
7) Windows not cleaned
8) The problem with the electricity was a blown fuse - this is simple, basic maintenance, no harder than changing a light bulb, should not have required an electrician, and is your responsibility
9) Walls in main bedroom are in a shocking condition with marks on them and chunks of plaster knocked out
10) Mould in the bathroom because you have not run the extractor fan sufficiently
11) Drains not kept clean (side of flat) causing a blockage and damp in the small bedroom
All in all I was very disappointed by the condition in which you left the flat, which was blatantly in breach of your obligations under the contract.
I have had this work done, total costs below, which I have deducted from your deposits.
1) £60 value of fridge
2) £55 for waste removal firm
3) £80 part of cleaners fee re carpet
4) £15 cost to clean sofa covers at laundrette
5) and 6) £40 for professional cleaning firm to thoroughly clean the flat (2ppl for 2hrs @ £10 each/hr, carpet cleaning covered separately)
7) £12 for window cleaner
8) £60 call out fee for electrician, no charge for any actual time/labour
It is not my intention to deduct any money for 9), 10) or 11), however I am perfectly entitled to do so. If you take an unreasonable position regarding paying for the work you have left for me to do, and [MY EX-FLATMATE] I know your view is normally to be as confrontational as you possibly can be, I will add these on and am getting quotes from builders for the repairs. The cost of a replacement fridge is £299 - if you are not happy with £60, representing the value of the existing fridge, that can easily be changed to the £299 replacement cost.
Payment has been authorised so should be in your banks shortly (Baboon: £272; [EX-FLATMATE]: £273). This payment is not negotiable.
See extracts from contract below.
7.7: Keep the drains, gutters and pipes of the Premises clear and the chimneys (if any) swept and the garden neat and free from weeds
7.8: Keep clean the windows of the Premises and replace all broken glass
7.16: Not place or allow to be placed on any of the internal walls of the building or any of the internal paint work posters, pictures or other similar items which require to be affixed to the wall or paintwork by bluetack or any similar substance
7.21: Deliver up the Premises to the Landlord at the end of the tenancy in the same good and clean state of repair condition and decorations as they were in at the commencement of the Term (fair wear and tear and damage by accidental fire excepted).
10.2.2: Make good all damage and breakages to the furniture and effects which may occur during the Term.
10.2.4: Clean or pay for the cleaning of all carpets, furniture, linen counterpanes, blankets and curtains (if any) included in the letting which shall have been soiled during the tenancy.
I will need your new addresses so that I can forward any mail that gets sent to [MY OLD FLAT] ([EX-FLATMATE], there is one letter for you now).
Boo! Hiss! Here is my response (which I haven't actually plucked up the courage to send yet):
Dear [SMELLY EX_LANDLORD],
This is regarding your e-mail about my deposit on [MY OLD FLAT].
I'm sorry that you're disappointed with the state of the flat, however I feel it's important to point out that it was not professionally clean when we moved in, the bathroom ceiling was already mouldy, my bedroom carpet was stained, the kitchen, fridge, cellar and garden all contained items abandoned by previous tennants, the front garden was full of rubbish, and the fridge freezer was broken.
It seems unfair that you have refunded the deposits of the other tennants in full without even inspecting the property, and now expect us to pay for the rubbish they have left and for not leaving the flat 'in the same good and clean state of repair condition and decorations as they were in at the commencement of the Term' when in fact the flat was far dirtier and contained more rubbish when I moved in than when I moved out, a fact which you would have known if you had been present to meet me when I first moved to the property.
Also it should be noted that during my stay in the property there were a number of issues which we brought to your attention that were not properly dealt with - the faulty freezer, the cistern leak, the faulty bathroom door handle and the poorly fitted cupboards. In fact, after the cistern leak, the carpet in the bathroom had gone mouldy (point 9 from your e-mail) and we had made you aware of this fact several times, but nothing had been done in that regard.
I will admit that we did not clear the drain or clean the windows, a fact for which I do apologise and will happily pay the price for in full (despite the fact that they were not clean when we moved in). We did attempt to replace the fuse, but neither of us could figure out how to remove the fuse in question, and since I have no wish to endanger my life through a risk of electrocution it seemed wise to leave it in the hands of experts.
I understand that [EX-FLATMATE]'s adversarial attitude, which I have tried to avoid, may have served to exacerbate the situation (which I assume explains the use of innapropriate and unprofessional language in your email), but it seems as though you are taking your personal disagreement with him out against me too. I would like to resolve this matter as swiftly and pleasantly as possible for all concerned, but as it stands your current terms are unacceptable.
Sincerely,
E Baboon (esq.)
So - what do you think? Do you have a leg to stand on? Seriously the flat was pretty dirty when we moved in, but because there have been people there all along he's never been around to inspect it until now. 20six, I thow myself upon your collective tender mercies - advise me!
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